Am I Lost?
A few months ago, I was awakening to the truth. That life is really available to us in the way we believe it to be. You think you can’t have it all? You live a life in lack, always having to choose between desires because its “impossible”. You have desires, but they stem from greed or the need to be seen? You’ll always be doing things for validation and not for sincere enjoyment and passion of fufilling one’s true purpose.
I am here, because I dare to be purpose driven. I dare to do something out of the norm that makes me feel alive. I want to be the girl I’ve imagined in my dreams, the girl God says I have all the tools to be. I am capable. And I have a deep discomfort recognizing that many of us fail to live to our fullest potential because we are envisioning a life with the glass half empty.
Due to the societal norms, many of us are waking up already exhausted to take on the day. We’re in a battle where the heart and the mind are trying to figure, do I live for me or do I do what they say will get me by? But truth of the matter is, even with their advice you’re still miserable. You’re still trying to figure out how to break free from the simulation you have shrunk yourself to attempt to perform so well in.
On the Road to being Found
Psalm 37:4 “Take delight in the Lord, and He will give you the desires of your heart.” Have you been going about it all wrong? Realign and focus your mind on God, and all that comes forth will be a true testament to you living a life in which you decrease and God increases. When we delight in Him, our desires begin to align with Him. And because He’s a man of His word He will fulfill what is truly good.
People fail to recognize that God knew you way before you took into account who you wanted to be, so trust that He will also open the doors to your destiny. It is He who knows the desires of your heart. God grants us free will, in which we do have the power for many things. But I pray that through all authority you choose to live for him and watch your room of opportunity open up. Watch your desires be shaped by Gods heart.
Deuteronomy 30:19 “This day I call the heavens and the earth as witnesses against you that I have set before you life and death, blessings and curses. Now choose life, so that you and your children may live..” We are free to choose. But how loving is our Father? He is the one that invites us to choose life by aligning with His ways. He may not force your hand, but He will position you. On many accords, you may think the things you’re experiencing are coincidences or as the new age would say “the universe” but God is so thoughtful. He will place you in situations you’ve prayed for, or simply envisioned and you’ll still be thinking of how to weather the storm on your own.
Genesis 40-41 Remember Joseph in the prison? I cannot imagine a man who dreamt it all, and saw the favor God blessed him with and thought being behind bars was apart of the plan? Like us, I’m sure he wondered “Did I take a wrong turn?” “Was that dream just me?” “Am I Still in God’s plan?”
The road from dream to destiny almost never runs straight. Joseph was obedient, his obedience still cost him some time in prison. Not for failure or rebellion. But for doing the right thing. And here lies the problem… Many of us take the right step, create the perfect piece, or draft a precise manuscript and still confusion sets in.
Through all trials, God is present. In the dark, in between places His presence fills the room. In the silence and even obscurity, there is an ache of waiting when nothing makes sense but still He remains.
For Joseph, when his moment came, the doors to freedom were glued to honorary fulfillment. So if you’re still standing, staring into emptiness feeling that you’re delayed… Remember that God hasn’t abandoned you. He’s the author to your story. He’s simply writing a story that’s longer than you thought, but better than you imagined. Isn’t life worth living when you come to recognize that you haven’t even seen the best of it!
1 Samuel 16-24 For David, he was anointed in his youth and still stood in the waiting for Gods command. He was chosen but not yet seated. In between the pasture and the palace, he was simply… becoming. Not lost. Not forsaken. But wrapped in the quiet kind of preparation that only the wilderness can hold. Through it all, he loved God still. Take note, that God stretches our character to match our calling. You are never forgotten, in this season delay does not mean denial. You’re being formed in the waiting.
Journal
Trusting Him in the waiting is strenuous. Surrendering in the stillness is difficult. But stressing things out of our control? Completely unhealthy. God really granted us a book that breathes life into riddled beliefs and makes everything right again. I too can be plagued with negativity, the need to establish control, and the fleshly design to do it my way. But why choose to live a life making the journey way longer than expected.
God’s timing is always right. His love remains true. And his desire for us all is to live in his design, trusting in his plan. Even if you orchestrate your life based off of your ambitions find a way to place God at the center of your desires. It leaves less room for confusion and more room for divine action.
I am in the in between. But God is a God of miraculous surprises. Recognizing that when I search for Him, He shows up quickly and exceeds my expectations. Today something wonderful is going to happen to me, and all of the glory will be given to God. Father reveal more revelation of your plans to prosper me, and grant me clarity when I am feeling troubled by the thought of what is to come. I lean on you and surrender all burdens, believing that you will supply my needs and align me to your perfect plan.
